The Journey Continues

 

Almost a full two years since I started, I was promoted to Blue Belt this month. My last post about Brazilian Jiu Jitsu was back in March, and now here we are, deep in December.

Going from a four-stripe White Belt to Blue was a long and grueling time period. Physically it became easier, but still taxing, but mentally, it became much harder.

This was especially so given the long period of time between my fourth strip and Blue, much longer than any period between stripes so far. All of the stripes on my White Belt came almost exactly three months apart, but going from the fourth stripe to Blue was almost 10 months.

During that time I went back and forth between feeling ready and past-due for the Blue Belt to feeling like I was nowhere close. These thoughts and contradictions consumed much of my thinking around the process, on one hand ready for the next level and on the other, feeling inadequate.

If you read the posts on the numerous BJJ Facebook groups about the topic, you find that is the norm. It seems no one feels ready and imposter syndrome prevails. They say things like trust your coach's decision and don't compare yourself to others but to your earlier self. That all makes sense, but it's mentally taxing regardless.

A large percentage of people quit when they reach Blue Belt. I would bet that it has a lot to do with this mental challenge. I'm sure there are other reasons, but the mental side of it would have to be high up there.

My coach told a story of a former White Belt of his who was competing in a tournament. During the match another coach came up to him and said "that woman's a Blue Belt."

"Yeah, she's pretty good," my coach responded.

"No, I mean she was a student at my gym who I promoted to Blue Belt," the other coach said.

So it seems one way to get around the challenge of being a new Blue Belt is to just start over at a different gym. But I don't feel like I need to do that!

It's been a few weeks since my promotion and I think I have come to terms with everything. I definitely feel like I am way better than when I started and I feel like I have learned a lot.

There are still White Belts who are better than me at some things, but I don't think that's what it's supposed to be about. It's easy to think that a Blue Belt should be able to beat any White Belt, but there are so many variables at play that it would be impossible for a system like that to function.

I'm not really sure where I'm going with this, but suffice it to say that right now, I'm comfortable as a new Blue Belt.

There is a long road ahead to the next belt, but being new at any level is a good time to put those thoughts out of your mind, put your head down, and charge forward.

Jiu Jitsu Journey

Earlier this month I was awarded the fourth stripe on my white belt in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. I have been training consistently, about three times per week, for 15 months. It has been what can only be described as a grueling grind in the most positive sense of the phrase.

There have been highs and lows, aches and pains, routine muscle soreness, stiff joints, injuries, you know, all the fun stuff.

I'm 49 years and one of the oldest people in my gym. In addition to being on the old side, I'm also one of the smallest, barring women and children, weighing in at just 150 pounds on an small to average 5' 9" frame. BJJ was allegedly designed to help a smaller person defeat a larger person, but don't let that fool you, size can matter.

I'm at the point now where I think I can comfortably handle a larger, untrained person, but the day in and day out rolling around on the mat with larger trained people is a grind.

Despite the age and size disadvantage, my experience so far has been good. I feel stronger, look fitter, and have learned some good self-defense skills. A lot of people claim that Jiu Jitsu turned their life around, made them a better person, cured all their ailments, etc. I can't go that far because I wasn't that bad off when I started, but I can see their point.

As a teenager, I never liked wrestling as a sport. I was a huge fan of the old WWF, now WWE, but donning a singlet and rolling around on a mat with another sweaty guy seemed... yeah, weird. Now, even though BJJ is not that much different than that, minus the singlet, I'm finding it to be quite fun.

A guy at my gym once commented, "This is just like wrestling around with your brothers as a kid," to which I would have to agree. Growing up with three brothers, two of whom did wrestle in high school, this feels a lot like that.

I mentioned injuries earlier. The first couple months of training was almost torture. My ribs hurt constantly and getting up in the morning was like being the tin man with no oil can in sight. BJJ also takes a lot of core strength and I could never tell what hurt more, my abs or my ribs, and often I couldn't tell where one started and the other ended.

Oddly enough, when I started Jiu Jitsu, I was having problems with golfer's elbow, which is a tendon problem caused by repetitive stress. Jiu jitsu cured my golfer's elbow but made every other joint in my body ache.

After a couple months it got easier, with only occasional body parts being tweaked the wrong way and aching for a few days. I'm currently nursing a mild shoulder injury and lower back pain. At the start of my third month, however, I injured the ring finger on my right hand. It was a mallet finger injury where the ligament on the last joint in my finger tore completely and I could no longer extend that finger.

That took about a year to heal, including several months in various types of casts and splints. Even today I can't fully extend that finger (and will never be able to) and I can't fully bend it yet either. Even with the injury I never missed a day of training. I sparred with the cast on and taped up.

That was difficult because BJJ is all about grips, especially wearing the Gi. There are two flavors of BJJ, Gi and No Gi. Gi Jiu Jitsu usually requires you to firmly grab the other guy's Gi to either throw him to the ground or choke him to near unconsciousness, difficult with a cast on your finger. No Gi was a little easier for me, you can really only grab wrists and ankles.

I end up training mostly in No Gi. The gym I go to happens to have more No Gi classes on days and times when I am available. They say No Gi is quicker and more explosive, not a good combination for an old guy, but I tend to enjoy it more because it's easier on my fingers.

Gi Jiu Jitsu requires strong grip strength and it beats the hell out of your fingers, my injury being the perfect example. Even training about a third of the time in the Gi, my fingers are still stiff in the morning and need a lot of stretching.

Now with 15 months under my belt, I'm getting closer to a promotion to the next level. In BJJ, there are fewer belts and longer time between them than any other martial art. I think to compensate for that they add the stripes on the belt. Assuming I stay on the course I've been travelling, I should hit Blue Belt later in the spring or early summer.

I have some thoughts on the whole belt process and the Asian-inspired trappings that surround most martial arts, but I think I'll save that for another post.

So that has been my experience so far. I plan to stick with it because it is a lot of fun and do feel like I get a lot from it. That said, I'll admit it's probably not for everyone. But if you can make it through the first few months, it can be rewarding.